Stupidest Comment on a Dog Breeder Website

Side note: As much as I’ve enjoyed the stirring inaugural coverage on Lassie, Get Help, Terrierman and Pet Connection, I’ve got to give a huge hat tip to the Bloggess, for combining politics with oatmeal & booze, and for her observation that Obama should now come out as gay.

Also? best comment ever: “everytime they show Bush listening to Obama he looks like he’s lost in his own dream world. He’s probably all “How many ponies should I have? I think a lot.””

There’s a lot of stiff competition for this years “Stupidest Comment on a Dog Breeder Website” awards (affectionately known as the “Dummies”).

For 2008, we’ve decided to open the competition up to that new phenomena in the world of internet puppy sales, the “I’m just selling these for a friend” websites.

If you haven’t bumped in to one of these yet, you’re in for a treat. These sites, which usually list puppies for sale in numbers well into the dozens, explain this plethora of  pups by saying that they don’t actually breed all (or sometimes any) of the pups themselves. Instead, driven apparently solely by philanthropy, these saints among men sell dogs for their ‘friends’, just because their friends have such fantastic dogs that it would be a shame to deprive the world of them.

Front running Dummie contender from this year’s newest category comes to us from the nice lady over at AmishPuggles.Com

Not content with giving us just one stupid statement, she’s given us three:

One of my faves:

Our puppies are raised in a barn with cats, horses, goats, sheep, chickens and pigs. So, they are socialized with other animals. Besides, puggles in general are great with other animals, but our puggles are more social than the norm because of the enviornment in which they are raised.

Yes, because nothing says “well socialized” to me like dogs that were raised with goats. I guess if I was looking for a livestock protection dog, I’d be thrilled.

Things just keep getting better from there, with this great paragraph:

I also bathe the puppies so that they do not smell like the barn when they come to you. I got the hint after some of my customers commented on how much they” loved the smell” of the barn on our puppies

Translation: After ten irate phone calls from people saying “Why the hell does this puppy reek like goats?”, we figured out we’d better dunk them in the water tank before we ship ’em.

The hat trick, however, comes from this touching description of the rearing conditions over at Chez Amish Puggles:

I also witnessed something that I have never seen before. One of the mothers decided not to give birth in the barn. Instead she dug a hole under a big maple tree stump that was overturned and has chosen to nurse and raise her babies there. I thought that was really special. I am going to put that picture on the website soon. It was just such a wonderful sight to behold.

Awww! Isn’t that adorable? A Pug is raising her puppies OUTDOORS. In New York State. In the winter. Under a TREE. Who knows, maybe it’s cleaner than the barn.

Holy freakin’ cow, if that’s not a hat trick of stupid comments, I don’t know what is.

Competition is open, folks – send me your best Dummie contenders, or better still post them in the comments, and we’ll start the voting around the end of February.