This Week’s Best Google Search Terms


Oh, teh Google – how do we love thee? Enough to mock the search terms people use on you, at the very least.

Here are this week’s top five “WTF?” search terms people used to get from their there to my here –

  1. zombies, attack, ice cubs, flame

    OK, I’m going to assume this has to do with the drink known as the zombie. Otherwise, if zombies are attacking you? Not the time to be googling for help. You should have prepared for this eventuality months ago. Slacker. Also, Zombies totally aren’t afraid of ice cubs. I am, though.

  2. beagles in my pajamas

    So many options. You’re looking for beagle patterned PJs? The dog has learned how to dress himself? The acid flashbacks have kicked in again? Hard to say.

  3. What toys do french bulls like?

    Given a choice, French Bulls would probably love to play with these guys.

  4. does my french bull dog like me?

    Sean, stop googling this. Delilah does love you – she just has an odd way of showing it.

  5. how much monet to buy a french bulldog

    Based on recent auction prices, I’m thinking just one Monet should get you an entire pack of French Bulldogs. Shoot, for that price I’ll sell you Sean (but I’m keeping Delilah. She doesn’t even really like him anyways).

The Infamous Mystery Clock Unveiled!

Thanks to everyone who donated to the French Bulldog Village’sWe’ll Stop at Nothing” fundraiser, Kimberly Rice has reluctantly agreed to unveil the mystery clock.

Here is Charlotte’s official announcement –

Here is the infamous mystery clock!

The fundraiser was dominated hands down by Kristen Boone of MD, with Tyree Pace of California coming in a determined but distant second. Altogether, we raised $425.00 for the privilege of revealing the mystery clock in all its ugliness. Thank you to all who contributed to make this fundraiser possible.

We finally got to see the clock! Aw, Kimberly, it’s not that bad. Interesting muzzle, and I love the big stitches ala Frankenstein holding together the left side of the face!

Enjoy the clock, Kristen!

And, here it is –

French Bulldog Village's Mystery Clock Unveiled!

French Bulldog Village's Mystery Clock Unveiled!

Kimberly had a few words to say, in her own defense –


If for one minute you thought I was fibbing about the true UGLINESS of this clock–well, here is the proof. OH MY GOSH!!! I cannot believe you are going to actually publish this!!!

I am going to have to send Kristin a REAL clock—I will let her pick the color and design. this one is just disturbing.

The muzzle even looks like it is bleeding.

Well, maybe not so much ‘in her own defense’, but at least she’s honest about this odd little clock’s faults. Personally, I think that this ‘ugly’ little clock (which was the forerunner of so many other, attractive clocks) is the absolute PERFECT fundraiser for French Bulldog Village, and the French Bulldogs that they help.

After all, FBV doesn’t always get the prettiest Frenchies into rescue. In fact, FBV seems to get more than its fair share of the halt, the lame and the down right ‘disturbing’ dogs. Look at poor Bella – hairless and stinky and not exactly a French Bulldog beauty queen. And yet in her own way, Bella IS beautiful – just like this clock, Kimberly. Your clock shines with inner beauty (OK, maybe that’s just the glare off of the bloody stitches, but you get the idea).

Either way, now you can’t say that you haven’t been forewarned – when it comes to raising money for French Bulldogs (and the occasional pug, Frenchie mix, and ‘oh, what the hell – if you squint it sorta looks like a Frenchie’), FBV will STOP AT NOTHING!

And remember, just because this fundraiser is over doesn’t mean that you can’t still give to FBV. After all, the world needs to have a place where the not so pretty French Bulldogs can turn to for help, and that place is French Bulldog Village. Let’s help them keep their doors open, so that no dog is turned away.

Use the paypal button below to give – don’t make us show you more photos of the clock.

Happy Birfday, Tessa! You’re 15 Years Young

Tessa At Fifteen, with her bratty great grandson Dwight

Tessa At Fifteen, with her bratty great grandson Dwight

Tessa spent the first 48 hours of her life living in a bathtub.

Her mom, Tara, decided to go into early labor the day before we were due to move house. Timing wasn’t perfect, and I was frankly in a state of panic. This was only my second French Bulldog litter, and no one had prepared me for ‘what to do if you have newborn puppies and a house full of movers’. I had to find a quiet room, one that wouldn’t have movers constantly going in and out of it, and that seemed to be the bathroom, on both ends of the move. I lined the tub with heating pads and thick blankets, turned on the space heaters, and stuck “Do NOT Open This Door For ANY REASON!!!” signs up.

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Count Down to Tessa’s Big Day!

Tessa turns Fifteen years old on November 22

Tessa turns Fifteen years old on November 22

It’s less than 24 hours until the big day – Tessa (Bullmarket Terror of Toronto) turns fifteen years old.

We’re holding a little party for her tomorrow, with her in house relatives, but I’m hoping for some photos of her kids, grandkids, greatgreatgrandkids, whatever! If Tessa is in your dog’s immediate pedigree, I’d love it if you sent me a photo.

Include their registered name, their pedigree (if you have it), and their call name, along with your name. I’ll be putting up a great big post with all the photos as soon as they’ve all come in.

Tessa gave birth to three litters, but those three litters produced 23 puppies, 21 of which survived! So, she’s got quite a family tree, and we’d love to see your ‘branch’ of it.

You can email your photo to me at

Your Friday Moment of Zen – Bullmastiff Puppies at One Day Old

Today’s moment of Zen is my friend Paula’s litter of TEN one day old Bullmastiff puppies. My favorite part of all comes at the very end – watching their tiny little tails wagging like metronomes as they eat. It’s been so long since I saw a litter of tailed puppies, I’d forgotten how vigorously they can wag them!

Warning: every dog in my house went nuts when they heard the squeaking of these little guys, so be forewarned.